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You Don’t Love Things

January 21, 2019

“Love people. Use things.” – The Minimalists 

What’s your favorite food? “Oh my gosh, I love tacos and guacamole, basically all Mexican food!” I also love writing, the beach, shopping, makeup, shoes, french fries, and summer. Do I really love all those things? No, but we’re all guilty of using the word love so flippantly. According to Merriam-Webster, love is: a strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties. None of these material objects or interests can actually be loved, yet the word is used so carelessly. Admit it. You say you “love” things so often without even thinking about it! Let’s really think about how we use the word love. 

I love guacamole, french fries, and popcorn.

I’ve said it so many times, even about the above items. “I love guacamole so much. I need some guac.” “I’m craving french fries and could really go for some right now.” “I love popcorn so much. I’d go to the movie theater just to get the popcorn.” I’ve been guilty of saying all of this and wrongly using the word love in relation to food.

It’s common to use the word love to describe food you are very fond of, but do you think anything of it? At the very least we should change love to like or enjoy, but the problem runs deeper. The problem is we are placing such a great importance on food and instantly grabbing or stopping to pick up the food we like best or crave. Instead, maybe we can stop ourselves each time we say we love a specific type of food, restaurant, or meal and think or pray about WHO we really do love in our lives.

I love shopping, handbags, and makeup

I would consider myself quite enthusiastic when it comes to all things clothes, accessories, makeup, beauty and skin products, shoes, even journals, pens, stationary, and anything of the like. I’ve been overly intrigued by these things since I was very young, and it’s only gotten worse.

I try to catch myself, when I say I love clothes or “I love those shoes, they’re so cute!” Yes, I get so excited by any of these items, but they are just items, material objects, not something to love. We can indeed have a huge or even extreme fondness for something, but try to remember it is a hobby or interest. Fashion and makeup can be an interest, and many make a living on blogging about those items I just mentioned! What they love, however, is hopefully their families and friends, not the material possessions.

I love to travel

Who doesn’t “love” to travel? I don’t know many people who don’t like to get away and have a much needed, wonderful vacation. Again, you don’t love to travel, but most likely it may be one of your favorite things to do more than anything. We shouldn’t confuse our favorite interests and activities for love. Yes, maybe you travel all the time and go all over the country or world, but still, you don’t love it. Love your family. Love your friends. Show love to other people you may struggle to show patience or acceptance.

This idea ties way back to the Bible. It’s not just something we hear. It’s an actual teaching in the Bible, in our faith. Even if you’re not someone who has faith or believes in God, I ask you to read this verse from Timothy with an open mind.

“For the love of money is the root of all evils, and some people in their desire for it have strayed from the faith and have pierced themselves with many pains. – 1 Timothy 6:10.

As a Catholic writing this, sometimes it admittedly makes me feel like a fraud to say I often catch myself saying I love any of the things I just mentioned. It especially makes me feel like a hypocrite, as I write this post on the topic and read the verse from Timothy. It’s one thing to catch yourself using the word love the wrong way so often, but it’s even harder to take the steps and action to place less enjoyment and value on money and material things. It’s hard for so many of us. I think admitting I’m also guilty of this and struggle with valuing and focusing on things which shouldn’t matter. We’re all flawed. We’re all human.

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Just Two Hours

September 13, 2017

“I restore myself when I’m alone.” – Marilyn Monroe

I’m sure I’m not the only one who finds herself having days of sudden tiredness, overthinking everything, or feeling unsettled from time to time. It’s probably normal to experience all or any of those emotions from time to time, and certainly there will be those times in life when you feel it more than usual. For whatever reason, this week has been a little consumed with this state of mind…and it’s only Wednesday! Today I did a few restorative, yet simple, actions I don’t often do. In just three easy steps, hopefully you can turn a day of negativity, frustration, uncertainty, or lack of confidence around!

 

A Ray of Sunshine

If your not-so-good day or uncertain feelings happen to fall on a day filled with any hint of sun, it will most likely be one of the easiest ways to improve your state of mind! This morning it was a little gloomy, no sun, just clouds covering the sky. As the sun came out more as the day went on, it gradually brightened my mood, as it brightened the sky. The sun just seems to make you see everything a little bit differently, a little bit better. As I got home from work, I began looking up some information on my phone for something I’ve been working on, and suddenly found myself dozing off. Yes, just sitting up reading something on my phone. This has been happening more often, and I haven’t been able to pinpoint quite why. It was then as I jolted back to reality, when I decided to get up and leave the house. I needed to get outside in the sun and be out in the world. Despite a long list of things I needed to get done, I grabbed my keys, got in the car, and drove to the beautiful outdoor mall five minutes from our house. The lake down the road and this mall are my go-to pit stops for recharging and pulling myself back together.

Grab a Bite … Alone

Yes, I said alone! Not all the time, but once in awhile, eating alone – at a restaurant – can be unexpectedly therapeutic for the mind! A few years ago, when a co-worker asked what I did for lunch, she was appalled to hear my response of grabbing something from one of the local restaurants and eating it outside on the patio … by myself! I didn’t understand why she was so shocked, but when I asked, she said she could never do that, because she’d feel like people would stare at her and think she had no one to join her for lunch. My response? “I love sitting outside and eating by myself sometimes, especially on a busy or bad day! I don’t even notice who is around, and no one ever seems to think anything of it. I see a lot of people doing the same thing, and I don’t care what they think anyway!” I don’t think that went over as a normal response, but that’s fine!

Maybe my love of doing this started back in college, when time alone in quiet became something to appreciate more than ever. I can’t even fully explain what it is I find so enjoyable or peaceful, but afterwards, I always feel a little more refreshed and refocused! If this is not something you make a habit every now and then, I highly recommend giving it a try! It will make you feel better, at the very least. Today’s choice, which I’m not saying was a healthy one, was eating outside at Chick-fil-A at the mall I mentioned earlier. I should mention I felt a little regretful of the food choice I made at Chick-fil-A and later came home, did a short workout, and had hard boiled eggs, a salad, and cottage cheese for dinner!

Indulge – minimally

Indulgence isn’t often given as advice to turn a day around, but the type of indulging I’m referring to is pretty harmless and minimal! I used to indulge way more often than I do now, mostly when it came to shopping, pampering, and socializing/eating out. When you get married and own a home, that’s just something which should naturally dissipate, for the sake of improving and saving for your family.

This doesn’t mean all luxuries should be put to rest! You still need to enjoy yourself from time to time. I will admit, when I go out with a friend, get my hair or nails done, or buy something new, I do probably get a little too excited. Another reason I have gone through the last few years trying to almost cut out clothes and accessories shopping, is due to the fact that once I start to buy a few things, I tend to get a little carried away and want to keep going! It hasn’t been easy to slow my shopping habits, but it has been worth it. It has also helped me practice self-discipline! For these reasons, I have come to appreciate the little indulges so very much! Back to today … my small purchase, after Chick-fil-A, came at the small price of just $9.99. I had been looking for a pair of gray leggings to replace mine, and I stumbled upon them during a quick stop into H&M. After H&M, I decided that was enough, so I went home and already felt better and motivated to do the short workout I mentioned earlier!

This little refresher outing took just two hours out of the day. That’s all it takes! Most people, if they find it worth it for their own well-being, can carve out one or two hours to refocus their energy. We all hear it so often … if you don’t take care of yourself, you won’t be good for others or able to support those you love. It’s an easy piece of advice to dismiss, because we usually put ourselves last. More often lately, I’ve started to remember I need to have periods of time to refocus myself and keep my priorities in check. It really does make a difference, and I hope you can use these tips to make time now and then for restoration!

 

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Filed Under: UncategorizedTagged: alone, blogger, confidence, eat, frustration, inspiration, life, mind, motivation, outside, recharge, refocus, restore, rva, self help, shopping, solitude, sunshine, time, uncertainty, wednesday, weekday

I'm a teacher and writer, who loves everything fashion, beauty, travel, inspiration, motivation, shopping, and education...to name some. I have a wide variety of interests and topics I'm excited to write about. Check out my main site for articles, poems, and how to hire me for freelancing!

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